I read the
New York Times article, "Brain Control in a Flash of Light." Scientist
Karl Deisseroth developed a fiber optic system, or a system of threads used to
transmit data, to trigger activity inside the brain of a live mouse. This is a
major advancement in the field of optogenics, which is "the most
revolutionary thing that has happened in neuroscience in the past couple of
decades" according to scientist Cori Bargmann. Scientists hope that his
will further advance this field and lead to revolutionizing discoveries.
This
development could have a large impact on humanity. From here, scientists could
use this fiber optic system to manipulate and change the brains of humans.
After this would be accomplished, it would be possible to attempt to cure
diseases or disabilities within the brain. This is a fascinating discovery and
is a large leap forward in neuroscience.
I thought that
this article was quite well written. I thought that he did a great job of
explaining the field of optogenics and giving an update on what is happening in
that field today. This was a very well written and informative article.
Source: http://www.nytimes.com/2014/04/22/science/mind-control-in-a-flash-of-light.html?_r=0
This was really well written, and I really liked this review by Brian for many reasons. One is that Brian was able to pick a very interesting topic to write about, instead of finding just any old boring article. This is important because as a reader I found the title and the contents of the article and review very appealing and engaging. Brian was able to make a good connection to our lives in the review also, and he does a good job of explaining in what ways the topic will affect all of our lives. Additionally, I like how Brian used a quote from the article in his first paragraph because it helped to validate what he himself was saying.
ReplyDeleteThere were only a couple of things that could be improved in this review. One is that in the first paragraph Brian says that this new discovery is the most revolutionary thing that has happened in neuroscience in the last couple of decades, but he leaves it at that. I would have liked it if Brian had elaborated on that some more. Likewise, in the second paragraph I think it would have been better if Brian put in some examples of how the fiber optics could change the brains of humans.
Overall this was a really good article review that taught me many new things about neuroscience and what is happening in the field right now. I had no idea that technology like the fiber optics described by the author even existed until I read this review, and that was eye opening for me. This new discovery opens up many doors in the field of neurology, and I can’t wait to see what happens next.
Brian, your review was very well written for many reasons. First, the summary section of your review was short but still included a lot of solid details. You went over the important points of the article without becoming too lengthy and including superfluous information. Next, your article was about a very interesting and appealing topic. When I went to find a review to do a comment on, the title of your article caught my eye immediately. Finally, the direct quote you included in your summary section was very strong. It helped to support and contribute to everything you had mentioned previously in your review.
ReplyDeleteThere are two main things I would suggest to improve your review. First, in the second paragraph, you stated, "From here, scientists could use this fiber optic system to manipulate and change the brains of humans." I would elaborate on this statement and answer the question 'How would they change the brains of humans through the fiber optic system?' You need some type of follow-up after that sentence. That's a big point to make, yet you just left the reader hanging. My second suggestion comes in the first and third paragraphs. In both of these paragraphs, you mention the word "optogenics" yet you don't define the word in your review even once. As a result, the sentences that come after are very confusing. It would help the reader immensely if you simply defined the word the first time you used it.
Overall, as I said above, I thought your review was good and the article you chose was unique and interesting. Personally, I didn't know about neuroscience and the possibility of curing brain diseases that come with it. This was an eye opener to say the least. It seems like this should be a big focus for scientists in the coming years since brain disease affects millions of people throughout the world and finding a cure for it would be an unbelievable thing. This article/review has inspired me to be on the lookout for new information on this topic in the future.
I read the review of the article, “Brain Control in a Flashlight.” This was a article review by Brian Kradjel. I really enjoyed Brian’s review. He was able to incorporate many good things into his writing. For example, he weaved quotes from the article into his writing. Another thing that Brian did well was the including facts from the article. The third thing that Brian did well was incorporating so many details into such a concise review. This is even more impressive when you consider that neuroscience.
ReplyDeleteAlthough this review was great, there were some areas for improvement. For example, I think he could have improved on his flow. At times, such as at the end of paragraph two, his paragraph just came to an abrupt close. Another thing that I thought he could have improved was that he could have cited some more facts on why this was so revolutionary in neuroscience. This could have added a lot to the review.
Overall, I think that Brian did a great job on this review with only minor things to fix. He explained this breakthrough in neuroscience really well. Prior to reading this article, I had no insight into neuroscience. He explained that this new idea was a critical piece of knowledge in the sturdy of neuroscience
I enjoyed Brian’s review. First off, I enjoyed that he defined fiber optic for the reader, as I would have had to look that up. Secondly, I felt that he did an exceptional job at bringing meaning to the reader in the second part of his review. Lastly, I enjoyed that Brian picked a very fascinating topic to review. This was a refreshing topic to hear about.
ReplyDeleteI felt like Brian could have elaborated on how the fiber optics can manipulate the brain. I also think that he could tell us about what disorders could be cured via the fiber optics.
I thought that this topic was extremely interesting. I never knew fiber optics could be able to manipulate a brain.
I liked how Brian started out with the title of the article; it really drags you in and makes you focus on what he is going to say. The next thing that I thought Brian did very well was that he explained what he was saying after he used confusing words like, “optic system.” The last thing Brian I though you did well was explain some amazing new concepts that could be discovered in science in the near future. This was extremely interesting.
ReplyDeleteYour review was very good Brian, but there are a couple suggestions that I have which I think will make it a little bit better. For example, the amazing fact that you said about being capable of changing a human’s brain, maybe you should go deeper into that fact and say how it will affect man kind. The other thing I think you could have also worked on was just overall detail you gave us some facts, but you could have elaborated more.
I was absolutely astonished when you mentioned that changing a human’s brain was in the picture. That is absolutely incredible. The only thing I’m questioning will it actually help the human race as a whole.
Brian did a great job. The article was intriguing in that the idea of a flashlight being able to control a brain is so strange. The ability to cure diseases with this is incredible. This discovery is so spectacular and seems unreal. I would never have believed something like this to be possible.
ReplyDeleteI think the review could have given some more information about what exactly it does in the summary. I think it also could have used some more information about how this can help the field of science.
I had no idea this field of science existed. I also didn’t know that a flashlight could have a control over the mind. It was a cool article.
Brian did a great job reviewing this article. I like how he connected this topic to our lives and made connections about how it could help further humanity. He also included a quote from a scientist, which makes his review more reliable. Another thing I liked about Brian’s review is how he included a lot of information and facts in his summary while still keeping it brief and interesting.
ReplyDeleteAlthough he did a great job on his review, Brian could improve in some areas. First he could have listed some of the diseases or disabilities that this new technology could cure. Another thing you could improve on is elaborating on how fiber optics can manipulate the brain.
Overall Brian did a good job reviewing the article, “Brain Control in a Flashlight”. I found it interesting and it was the first time I had heard of this groundbreaking technology.
Brian wrote a great article review. One thing I enjoyed in particular about his review is that he made a connection to every day life. The title especially drew me in to reading his review. I also liked how he took quotes from the article and used them in his writing.
ReplyDeleteI think Brian could have explained fiber optics a little and how it can manipulate the brain. I also think he could have gone into further depth in general into this whole article.
Overall, Brian's article review was very good. I found it very interesting and had never heard of this before.
I read Brian’s review for the article “Brain Control in a Flash of Light” Posted in the New York Times and I found it to be rather interesting. Who knew that you could control the brain based off of lights directed toward the eye? Very interesting. Brian’s review had multiple parts that should be praised. The first thing is that he includes both background information and specific information to inform the reader about the piece of technology. He also takes direct quotes from the article that help us to become even more informed about the research.
ReplyDeleteEven though the review was well done there were some areas of improvement needed. First thing that I saw is in the first sentence which is that he did not include the author of the article. This is a huge pet peeve of mine and I hope that in his next review he will not make the same mistake. The second thing I realized is that both the 2nd and 3rd paragraphs are a bit lacking. Maybe he could instead put more detail into these paragraphs about what was in the article.
As I said before this is an amazing article! It was so fascinating that I actually clicked the hyperlink Brian provided and read the entire article. This says a lot because I never do that. The idea is fresh and beneficial but the way I interpreted the article was a little different. I found that there are two sides to this story which is that this technological discovery can both hurt and help us. Brian has already stated the benefits but he didn’t explain about some side effects. For instance, if our intentions are to help cure some illnesses with this that involve the brain, wouldn’t messing with it with rays of light effect it even more? Just something to think about.
The review made by Brian was really good.I liked how he made the reference to the scientist who made the discovery and also that he gave a gave the explanation of this discovery in a easy way to understand.He also did a good job relating the discovery with our world, and the impact if can have in our lives.I also liked how Brian made the citation for the quote in the first paragraph.
ReplyDeleteSomething that he could made better is giving a little more information on how did they make this discovery or achieve such result.I also think that Brian could give some examples on how do this system can change our brain.
I didn’t know before reading this article that such fiber optic system could change the brain of humans, and also that it can cure diseases.It is really an very important advance for the humanity.
Overall, I liked Brian’s review of “Brain Control in a Flashlight”. One thing I liked in particular was how he incorporated quotes from the article seamlessly. Also, I thought he included many relevant facts into his review. Finally, I felt Brian clearly understood his topic because of how many details he added into his review.
ReplyDeleteBesides the quotes, I felt Brian’s review was a little choppy, and the paragraphs ended pretty abruptly. Also, I wish Brian included more reasons why this is so revolutionary to neuroscience because it would have been nice to have something to compare this feat to.
Before reading Brian’s article, I was unfamiliar to neuroscience, so I was glad to learn what I could from his article and what new technology and advances are occurring in this field.