James Ackerman
New science helps a paralyzed man move his legs for the first time in years
By: Elizabeth Cohen and John Bonifield
http://www.cnn.com/2015/01/06/health/feat-paralysis-tech-help/index.html
"New Science Helps a Paralyzed Man Move His Legs for the First Time in Years - CNN.com." CNN. Cable News Network, n.d. Web. 09 Feb. 2015.
The article I read was called,”New science helps a paralyzed man move his legs for the first time in years” and was written by Elizabeth Cohen and John Bonifield. The article was about how science and technology can help people and their health. The article focuses on a man named Calven Goza. Calven was in a car accident involving a drunk driver. The crash resulted in Calven paralyzed from the waist down. A man 24 years old and paralyzed from his waist down. Calven was a determined man. He spent 2.5 hours everyday in the morning trying to lift his legs. His determination got him to the University of Louisville. There the doctors inserted electrodes in his spine. They did this because they could send electric shocks to assist the humans paralyzed body move. The doctors had to find the exact right amount of electricity to shock. The doctors were successful with Calven and 4 other patients. The doctors are hoping to eventually get their patients to be able to walk again. With this technology available, the future is looking very bright.
This scientific discovery is life changing to humanity. Imagine being not able to move or feel you legs than being able to walk. Walking is not the only difficulty for a paralyzed human. Paralyzed humans really struggle going to the bathroom and having sexual activity. This science “experiment” enabled Calven to do what paralyzed people can’t. This scientific discovery does not only allow humans to walk again but to once again become sexually active and have total control over their bowels and bladder
Elizabeth Cohen and John Bonifield both did a great job writing the article. I liked the fact it was based off one person. It made you feel sympathy for Calven and then feel happy for him. The authors did a good job in using quotes in their article, it really made the article enjoyable to read. As well as text, I liked the use of pictures throughout the article. The one thing I think the authors could have done better is had a better title. I felt the title was too long and they could’ve thought of a more creative shorter title. Overall I really enjoyed the article and I hope this science helps many people in the future.
One aspect of the review that was good was the summary. It provided a brief explanation of what was happening but got the main idea in. The summary made me want to read the article because of how interesting he made it. Another part I liked was the article overall that he chose because it was about a fascinating topic which many people who have gotten into accidents could relate to. The article could give them hope as to how they could possibly live their future and how technology could solve their problems. A third aspect of the review that I liked was his critique because I think he did a good job addressing the good points to the article such including quotes and pictures to aid the text, but he also pointed out the bad parts to the article such as the long name which could be shortened and more appealing. A part he could have done better was the significance to your personal life/to humanity part. He could have added more to that with some examples from his own life (perhaps a broken foot). Most people know how hard life is walking around on crutches and going up stairs for a month or two is and how people with paralyzed legs struggled with those things every day in their lives. I like his critique of the article but I do think he could have added more to how the article was bad. There were many good points to the article and only one bad thing. The authors could explain better how the technology worked and more about the treatment that he received. One thing I was impressed by when reading this was the rate at which technology is evolving and at how many lives this technology could possibly improve.
ReplyDeleteJames did a great job presenting the problem of the article and building around that to develop sympathy for Goza, the victim. One of the strengths of the article and James’ response is that the article is interesting. He introduces the connection between science and technology which is ever present in our society today. James also mentions that the victim, Goza, is attending Louisville University. By putting this in, he makes the summary end on a positive note. Finally, one of the best things this review offers is an insight on how technologically advanced we are today. James needs more details in his summary. I feel there was a lack of flow in his first paragraph, but that could be fixed with a few transitional sentences. Also, after stating someone’s full name (Calven Goza), you shouldn’t refer to his first name only his last name the following times you mention him. The reason I chose to comment on this review was because I thought that the topic is very interesting. You don’t often hear of a man that was paralyzed from the waist down in a car crash being able to walk again. The whole part about inserting electrodes into his spine is very fascinating.
ReplyDeleteJames gave a great background of how the man had become paralyzed in a car crash and how technology made him be able to do what he thought he would never be able to do again which is move his legs. He talks about what Calvin the victim did every morning trying to get his legs to work which i thought gave us some detail on the changes he had to make in his life. James conclusion was written very well i like how he ended on a note of describing the sympathy the reader felt for Calvin and the joy they felt to see him be able to do something he was told almost could never happen again.
ReplyDeleteI believe James review could have been a little longer going more in depth on the electric shock therapy they used on the patients and describing how the treatment worked. i felt that james should have written a little more detail becuase it feels like the treatment he took and the types of things he had tried besides shock therapy and the 2 and a half hours in the morning would have helped his argument.
i was impressed by the fact of how far our science has gone and how now we are able to make the so called impossible actually occur.
James, you explained the story of Calvin well enough so we could get some nice background in him, the person we are reading about. I also very much liked how you used great detail in how the procedure was done and the exact parts of his body it would fix and what parts it would not be able to and the steps he took to get where he needed to be to get his legs fixed. I also really liked how you brought some imagery into your response, “Imagine being not able to move or feel you legs than being able to walk”.
ReplyDeleteI dont know if this was possible or not, but i would have liked if you could have included more about the other 4 people and what happened to them and of there were any failures. I also think you could have included the names of the doctor who performed these operations, again i don't know it this was possible or not.
I did not this technology was out there. i knew of machines that palazed people could control with their mind so they could use pralazed limbs but i am impressed that doctors have figured out how to do this and change peoples lifes.
James, you did a phenomenal job presenting the problem in a clear and coherent manner. From the beginning, I was able to understand where you were going with the article. You also drove home how important this new technology is today in our society and because of this new technology we have the potential to help those in need. I also thought you did a great job at introducing the character, Calven Goza, and because of this, we were able to really feel for him and understand what he went through.
ReplyDeleteI feel that you need to work on the flow within your paragraphs as it is somewhat choppy, although that is an easy fix. I also feel that one thing you could do better next time is to add more detail. Although the article is very clear and concise, I feel that if you were to add more information, your review would be a lot more interesting to read.
I am very happy and surprised to hear that we have created this extraordinary technology so that we will be able to help the wounded. I know a man who is paralyzed and seeing him rolling around in a wheelchair just made me feel so sorry for him. I am glad to hear that this technology has been created.
Hey Jackerman, well presented man. I liked how you went into great detail into the background story of Calven and his accident. It really gave me some sympathy to Calven, and made me want to read on more. Another note I'd like to add is how well you presented the problem, and showed us the solution to Paraplegic peoples nonworking body parts. Lastly, I'd like to point out on how well you ended your written report off with a great statement: "This scientific discovery does not only allow humans to walk again but to once again become sexually active and have total control over their bowels and bladder". Although this was an amazing written report about the article, there are some suggestions I'd like to share with you. First off, I think you should have started your written report with something interesting to grab the readers attention. Another tip I'd like to give to you is to not repeat yourself throughout your report. For example, you've started your sentence off with "The Article" three times in the first paragraph. All in all, it was a stellar report, and my mind has expanded in the field of science.
ReplyDeleteJames captured the reader’s attention effectively by giving details/backstory about the event that caused Calvin Goza’s paralysis from the waist down. James did a very good job explaining how without Calvin’s determination he would never have had the opportunity to regain the movement in his legs. James’ details are good in supporting and capturing the main idea of the article that technology can help change lives of paralyzed people.
ReplyDeleteJames may have gotten the main point across, but he needs more details about Calvin’s actions he took that got him to the University of Louisville. If he had done that it would have felt more detailed and completed. I don’t think James gave enough detail about the process and testing Calvin went through. Also James should have included if there were any setbacks and whether or not the procedure failed with others.
The story was very interesting to learn about and I am very impressed that they were able to give a man who has paralyzed legs a chance to walk again. This could change many lives and give people who never had the chance to walk a chance.
ReplyDeleteJames, I really enjoyed learning about this new life changing technology. You did a great job conveying Mr. Goza’s story, it is incredible how he was able to regain control of his legs after becoming paralyzed. All of the detail you included about Mr. Goza’s determination really “drove home” the point. I totally agree with your sympathy and happiness for Mr. Goza. You did a good job making me sympathize with Mr. Goza and all the other disabled patients in this program. Although, there was one instance where I knew what you were trying to say but, it wasn’t quite worded right. You say, “A man 24 years old and paralyzed from his waist down.” I would have added the word imagine, before the statement so it would have read clearer. I would write, “Imagine a man 24 years old and paralyzed from his waist down.“ I really like your point but this way it would have read a bit better. I disagree with your criticism towards the title of the article. The title is long, but it effectively summarizes the entire article.
Prior to reading your review I didn’t know that scientists were developing technology to enable paralyzed people to use their limbs again. As soon as I saw your article I was interested because I thought regaining movement in paralyzed limbs was impossible. I am happy because your article review showed me that it is possible and there is hope for those who are paralyzed. Usually when I think on some one who is paralyzed I just think about not being able to walk. Your second paragraph really opened my eyes to all the limitations that come with being paralyzed. If the procedure is successful it should be offered to all patients with paralyzed limbs.
ReplyDeleteJames wrote about an article called ”New science helps a paralyzed man move his legs for the first time in years.” This article was about a man named Calven Goza who was able to move his legs after being paralyzed for many years. One thing I liked that James did in his review was that he was very straight forward, which was shown in these sentences, “There the doctors inserted electrodes in his spine. They did this because they could send electric shocks to assist the humans paralyzed body move.” Sometimes reviews can be written in a confusing or complicated manner that make it hard to understand, and James didn’t do that which is one reason why I like his review. Another thing I liked is that James tried to make you relate to it/ think about what it would feel like for that to happen to you. He did this by saying things like, “Imagine being not able to move or feel you legs than being able to walk.” Another thing he did that I liked was he added a lot of detail which made the story even more interesting. One thing that could be improved is James could have added more about how the doctors got his legs to move, and more about the process of it. When he was talking about how the doctors got Calven’s legs to move I felt there needed to be more there. One more thing I think James could improve was adding to the critique of the article, because he only critiqued the title. I was amazed that the doctors at University of Louisville were able to get this man to move his leg again and it was an amazing discovery on their part.